http://neuronautica.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] neuronautica.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] jedishampoo 2010-11-27 07:53 am (UTC)

Not disappointed, and I don't see anything that was too out of order or place...

However, I think you should be a bit more careful when it comes to dialect in certain time periods. Reading the dialogue between America and England, it felt a lot later than it was. Mind you, England's wordings were good, but America's were almost too modern in their quips and choice phrasings.

Just a suggestion. Keep up the writing! ^^

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